Yes I can!

So it appears I have totally missed the entire month of May for my blog :( ... I really didn’t mean to but I just have had little time and energy to do much of anything :/

Since I last did my blog...I have checked a few more things off my "TO DO List". I feel like I have learned even more about myself and more than ever I have taken the saying "where there is a will there is way" to an entirely different level...haha!

On May 3rd I participated in my very first Sprint Triathlon. This took place down the shore at YMCA Camp Zehnder Wall, NJ ...it was named the Bubble Triathlon. I needed to Swim 200 Yards, Bike 11 Miles, Run 3.2 Miles. This would be the very first time I was getting myself on an actual bike since my incident. All this time leading up I was just training on the stationary bike at the gym. This did not go that well.....haha! I never fell or anything but man was I slow! I was nervous about my balance, not knowing how to shift gears...it really was difficult but slow and steady I made it thru it. It was during the bike portion that I had realized I was the very last person! I'm like how did that happen...how did I become last? The poor people directing traffic were waiting for me to shut it all down!! "Come on lady pedal faster"...is what I think they were saying under their breath! haha!

As I was riding one of the cops pulled up to me and tells me what a good job I'm doing and then shares with me that he had to be removed out of the water by lifeguards the last time he attempted to do a Tri and never got to do the bike or the run! ...so I was much further than he had ever done! I thought that was really nice of him to share that story with me...only for the sake of making me feel better about myself.

I forgot to also share that I have right beside me my coach/psychical therapist/ my friend Jerry Yoo. I have spoken about him before :). Here is a man that can win the entire thing....he got out of the pool and waited for me. He road right next to me and tried to guide me on how to shift gears. He is truly the best example of a selfless person. He shared with me that this was one of the first times during a race he was ever able to take it all in...there was no pressure for him.  His only job was just to hang out with me during this race :)

So I finally make it back into the transition area....and now it is time to run...good god! Running...how I loathe you! There is nothing good about running in my mind...I am not good at it period! It hurts my insides! My legs feel like jello but let’s now run a 5k...blah! So me and Jerry take off and are ready to run and there are two more amazing people joining us...Laura and Amy. They are part of our fitfam and they just got back from finishing the triathlon. They turned around and went back out with me and Jerry. Amazing! I made sure I told them not to ever expect me to do this for them...lol because there would be no way! hahaha! So now we are all running this last stretch of the race. It was a really beautiful run I have to say. We are finally coming up to the end and I realize we are now getting a police escort....are you frigin kidden me? Let’s bring more attention to the slow girl! hahaha!

We are coming into the finish and Jerry hangs back and lets me cross over the finish first so he is the very last person to finish the race. Again...amazing selfless people!

All of the volunteers were there cheering me on with of course my husband and our new friend Tasha. Since my husband had some time on his hands while waiting for me he had told a few people my story. These people that I didn’t know seemed so genuinely thrilled to see me cross that finish line. Not just so they can go home and call it a day...but were just so happy for me. I was so happy for me! That feeling of psychically crossing that finish was the most incredible feeling for me. Like wow I just did that. I didn’t have a heart attack and I finished...yay me!

Jerry, Me, Laura and Amy.....amazing people.  I am so grateful for all of them!

Thrilled I was able to do this race before the one I have coming up in a few weeks. It was real great practice for me.

In May we also celebrated Mother’s day...one of my absolute favorite days! I had to go on a business trip to Atlanta and we celebrated my beautiful girls Shays16th birthday!

Enjoying a beautiful day in Hoboken on Mothers Day with my best girl xo

Back to training...Jerry had mentioned several times to me that I will need to practice swimming in the open water for the upcoming tri on June 20th. He had finally put me in touch with this woman Ellen who trains all levels of athletes in the open water including himself. I went up there with a few others and what happened next I wasn’t expecting. I had a panic attack in the open water! I cried like a big baby! Swimming in the lake water without seeing the bottom really is something I never really gave much thought to...it is a completely different animal than swimming in the pool! I finally got my barring’s and I was able to do it...thanks to Ellen for calming my nerves...she is amazing! Swimming in the outdoors really was a great feeling...sun beaming on your face a swan swimming nearby with her babies...just a completely wild experience for me. I will need to keep practicing as much as I can before the 20th to make myself comfortable in that lake!

A gorgeous morning right on the lake! Open water swimming is no joke!!
 

As if I didn't have enough to worry about and train for...I had signed up to do the Spartan Sprint up in Tuxedo NY June 6th. If you recall I had posted a picture of me wearing a helmet last blog :) This was by far the most psychically hardest and challenging thing I think I had ever done in my entire life! Hills Hills and more hills! Holy crap! I had tears in my eyes at one point...I really was like why the f@*& am I doing this willingly! So after crawling under barbwire, scaling a few walls, carrying a bucket filled with rocks up a hill...and much more with my hubby and fitfam right alongside of me....another check off the to-do list and another finish without having a heart attack...yay again! So grateful for my husband and the others that helped us get thru every obstacle!

Love my husband so much for being there for me :)

So now that I have finished two big things....this is what I have learned...I never felt that I was/am fully ready for either of these races...the Tri or the Spartan. I felt like I should have trained more running up hills and I should have practiced the bike etc...but what I have learned is that psychically I CAN DO THIS....my body is saying I can...it’s my mind that questions it. So when my mind is cooperating...I CAN DO THIS. I am not a 100% where I should be for this upcoming Tri which is longer than the Sprint Tri ( 1/2 mile swim 17 mile bike and 5 mile run)...I have never done any of those distances. I am praying and hoping that my body cooperates but more importantly my will and my determination will get me across another finish line on my "to do" list.

I have appreciated so many of you reaching out to me to offer some guidance and sharing some of your own experiences with me. I can’t tell you how much it has meant to me. The continued support is just simply amazing. I have this weekend a practice run...its called Lap the Lake up in Franklin Lakes, NJ.  This takes place in the same lake where the actual Triathlon will be.  It allows people to basically practice in the lake a week prior to race day.  So I will have this to do this upcoming weekend...and I'm so nervous!  I'm nervous because I know this will determine a lot for me...I pray it doesn't take me too too long and I simply don't let my nerves get the best of me and I finish.

I love how so many people are wanting to come and cheer me on for the upcoming Tri on the 20th. It really means so much to me...I've been telling people to come with a chair and a cooler lol...god knows how long this will take me.  But I am going to finish!!!

Thanks again for all your love and support!!! xo